A three-tier funnel governing qualification for any relationship — short or long term. Every tier must be passed in sequence. Failure at any level is disqualifying for that tier and everything above it.
Visual model
A pyramid of romantic selection.
The Love Hierarchy is not just a list. It is a gate structure. The top tier decides whether attraction can start; the middle tier decides whether the dynamic has enough energy; the base tier determines whether a serious relationship has enough long-term support.
Primary failure blocks everything above casual interest. Secondary weakness limits long-term eligibility. Tertiary weakness does not always kill attraction, but it weakens the relationship’s ability to last.
Below: Jason's own hierarchy, a synthesized generic-male baseline, then two takes on the generic female — Claude's as an attribute ranking, ChatGPT's as advancement gates. Same prompt, different lenses. Open any “Sequential gates” to expand its full breakdown.
Blue — Jason's hierarchy Indigo — generic male (synthesis) Scarlet — female · Claude (attribute) Wine — female · ChatGPT (gates)
Jason's Hierarchy his own · attribute ranking
Tier 1
Primary Factors
Physical attractiveness · Classiness · Attraction towards me
Tier 2
Secondary Factors
Fun & Easygoing · Assertiveness / Initiative · Purity / Lack of Baggage
Tier 3
Tertiary Factors
Alignment in values · Common interests · Availability
Sequential gates
Primary factorsThe core attraction gate
01
Physical attractiveness
Face, body, and overall physical appeal — what registers first, before anything else.
02
Classiness
Carries herself with grace and refinement — dignified, not crude or attention-seeking.
03
Attraction towards me
The pull runs both ways — she's visibly drawn to me, not just tolerating interest.
Any single factor unmet → immediate disqualification. No exceptions, short- or long-term.
passes gate →
Secondary factorsThe relationship energy layer
01
Fun & Easygoing
Light, playful, low-maintenance company — easy to be around, not tense or high-friction.
02
Assertiveness / Initiative
Meets me halfway — initiates and contributes instead of leaving me to carry everything.
03
Purity / Lack of Baggage
Little heavy history or unresolved damage; not dragging a chaotic past into the present.
All three met → long-term eligible. Partial → short-term only.
long-term path →
Tertiary factorsThe long-term fit layer
01
Alignment in values
Agrees on the things that decide a shared life — how to live and where it's headed.
02
Common interests
Enough overlap in how we like to spend time that the relationship has its own texture.
03
Availability
Actually free to invest — emotionally, practically, and in timing.
Assumed in a long-term context — these factors sustain the relationship.
A generic male synthesis · advancement gates
Gate 1
Desire
Physical attractiveness & vitality · Sexual receptivity · Low-friction presence
Shared values & family · Emotional stability · Practical compatibility
Sequential gates
Gate 1 · DesireCan she enter the romantic-sexual frame?
01
Physical attractiveness & vitality
Face, body, femininity, grooming, and style — plus youth, health, and energy. The immediate "do I want her?" signal.
02
Sexual receptivity
She shows real attraction back — warmth, flirtation, touch, openness — not cold tolerance or passive evaluation.
03
Low-friction presence
Pleasant to be around: not combative, chaotic, contemptuous, or emotionally punishing from the start.
Fail any one and she never enters the frame — desire is the gate, and warmth, values, or loyalty can't manufacture it.
passes gate →
Gate 2 · AttachmentIs she emotionally safe to invest in?
01
Warmth & kindness
Affectionate, appreciative, gentle in tone; makes his life feel lighter rather than heavier.
02
Loyalty & exclusivity
Not advertising constant availability or playing him against other men; no reason to doubt commitment.
03
Respect & admiration
Genuinely likes him and values his effort; doesn't treat him as a utility, placeholder, or status accessory.
Clear it and he can attach. Fail it and she stays attractive but short-term — unsafe to invest in.
long-term path →
Gate 3 · Life FitCan he build a stable life with her?
01
Shared values & family
Aligned on commitment, children, domestic life, culture if relevant, and what a good life is for.
02
Emotional stability
Conflict doesn't curdle into cruelty, volatility, or endless drama; she repairs instead of escalating.
03
Practical compatibility
Lifestyle, habits, money behavior, social rhythm, and daily routines can actually coexist.
Where a life holds together — values, stability, and daily compatibility decide whether it lasts.
A synthesis of two blind AI proposals (Claude + ChatGPT), arbitrated. The male asymmetry: status, income, and achievement — near the gate for women — rarely create desire on their own here. The male gate is blunter: do I want her, does she want me back, and is it safe to invest?
A generic female · Claude's take attribute ranking
Tier 1
Primary Factors
Confidence & frame · Status & ambition · Physical attractiveness
Self-assured and non-needy; holds his own center instead of leaning on her for it.
02
Status & ambition
Direction and drive — competent, going somewhere, commands a room without trying.
03
Physical attractiveness
Genuinely attractive to her — looks, grooming, the masculine presence she wants.
Any single factor unmet → no real attraction. Disqualifying, short- or long-term.
passes gate →
Secondary factorsThe relationship energy layer
01
Spark & chemistry
That hard-to-fake electric pull — humor, tension, the feeling of being drawn in.
02
Leadership & pursuit
Leads and pursues decisively; makes plans and makes her feel chosen, not kept waiting.
03
Stability & treatment
Emotionally steady and kind in how he treats her — safe, consistent, no games.
All three met → long-term eligible. Partial → short-term / situationship only.
long-term path →
Tertiary factorsThe long-term fit layer
01
Provision & stability
Materially reliable — can build and hold down a life, and provide if needed.
02
Commitment & loyalty
Wants to commit and stays faithful — in it for real, not keeping options open.
03
Shared values & goals
Aligned on the big questions — kids, lifestyle, where the relationship is going.
Weighted toward provision & commitment for the long haul — these sustain the relationship.
Synthesized from mate-preference research — central tendency, not any one person. Note the diagonal: status sits at her gate, and provision/commitment ride higher than they do on the male side.
A generic female · ChatGPT's take advancement gates
Provision capacity · Shared values & lifestyle · Character under pressure
Sequential gates
Gate 1 · DesireCan he enter the romantic frame at all?
01
Attraction
Face, body, height, style, voice, smell, physical presence — the first filter, even when softened into "vibe."
02
Masculine competence
Confidence, social ease, decisiveness, status signals, self-command — does he seem like a capable man?
03
Safety & calibration
Not creepy, not chaotic, not socially blind; shows interest without making her feel trapped or embarrassed.
Fail any one and he never enters the frame. Attraction opens the door, competence keeps it romantic, safety lets her stay in it.
passes gate →
Gate 2 · TrustIs he worth the emotional risk?
01
Consistency
Follows through and communicates clearly; doesn't vanish and reappear or make her feel disposable.
02
Emotional attunement
Notices her, reads tone, makes her feel chosen — warm without becoming needy.
03
Selective investment
Not just chasing access to any woman; he makes her feel specifically valued.
Clear all three and she relaxes into the risk. Gaps here keep him at arm's length, however attractive.
long-term path →
Gate 3 · FitCould she build a life around him?
01
Provision capacity
Not just rich, but functional: direction, discipline, earning potential, handles adult life.
02
Shared values & lifestyle
Family plans, social rhythm, religion/politics if relevant, ambition, long-term expectations.
03
Character under pressure
Conflict style, loyalty, honesty, patience — does he turn cruel, weak, or reckless when things get hard?
Where a life is built — values, provision capacity, and who he becomes under pressure decide whether it lasts.
ChatGPT's framing: attraction opens the door, competence keeps the frame romantic, consistency lets her relax, stability makes him future-shaped. The asymmetry: kindness, loyalty, and emotional availability are real but rarely Gate-1 — they gain power only after attraction and competence clear the first filter.
Build your own hierarchy
Design a custom hierarchy on your own terms — name your own tiers, add or remove them, with up to five factors each. No longer fixed to primary, secondary, and tertiary. Saved automatically in your browser. Export or import as JSON to back up or share.